Sunday, December 12, 2010

Homesick...

I think all travelers would agree that “no one realizes how beautiful it is to travel until he comes home and rests his head on his old, familiar pillow.” – Lin Yutang... This is something I have come to realize even without the experience.
For those of you who are very close to me, you already know that I am missing home, especially during this time. Currently, I am having an inner battle between what I know & what is new. I'm not sure if this was all triggered by the realization that I will not be going home for quite some time, or simply because it's the holidays... Either way I have been feeling vibrations in my soul that tell me that my time in the states is not over. This realization is something I knew I would face during my overseas excursion, and to be honest before I left I assumed it would be the opposite.
Currently I have a deep hunger for a few things that I left behind, & the most powerful is my yearning for my friends & family. Or should I just say my family, because all of my friends are a part of me like my family... These travels have made me realize how authentic & meaningful all of my relationships are, & my love & gratitude for each of them has only grown with the distance. Sometimes it feels unsettling to be so far away from the people who I am closest to, and I sit with this feeling & know it is rooted out of genuine love & appreciation for all of the ones who have come across my path & effected me deeply. So the reason I am writing this blog is to set intentional appreciation & allow the space this time deserves & let all of my friends & family know how deeply you are missed, & that everyday you ride humbly in my soul. You ALL are my roots, & without you I would be a tree that has already collapsed.
At the same time that I want to sit & reflect upon this awareness of love & gratitude for my family, I want to also offer respect & recognition to the opportunities I have been granted. I realize that I attracted everything that is happening in my life right now, & I am remaining open & committed to the journey that unfolds for me daily. In my heart I know that this opportunity that has presented itself as an experience that WILL evolve my consciousness, & therefore I will continue to maintain & ride out the colorful emotions that are attached to it.

The other two things that I truly miss about living in the states, is OBVIOUSLY the music scene, which I have also grown a new vision & appreciation for, and... pickles (dill pickles-there are just some things you cant find over here)... But all in all, these other two arn't actually as important, they're just cravings...


“Traveling is a brutality. It forces you to trust strangers and to lose sight of all that familiar comfort of home and friends. You are constantly off balance. Nothing is yours except the essential things – air, sleep, dreams, the sea, the sky – all things tending towards the eternal or what we imagine of it.” – Cesare Pavese

2 comments:

  1. I miss you more than you know.....cannot wait for the next Brynn and Ash time! Merry Christmas to you and Matt! <3 sending all my love and positive thoughts your way....

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  2. Loving You, Thankfulness for You, and the Greatest Admiration for You...Love Mom

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